“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”
- Albert Einstein
Are most of us insane? According to this quote we are. We do the same things day after day and expect our life to change in some miraculous way. And if you think about it logically this quote is spot on. How can something change unless we try something different?
So why is it that most of us find change so difficult? It all has to do with that persistent little thing called ego. We are comfortable in our routine life and fearful of what might happen if we try something new.
“The key to change... is to let go of fear.”
- Rosanne Cash
What is it that we are fearful of? well, there are a number of things, but most of us fear loosing our perceived identity. We think that who we are is determined by what other people think of us, we fear that by changing, our friends and family won't like us anymore. In my humble opinion, any friend or family member who has a problem with you changing for the better and becoming a happier person is not a true friend. It is a very selfish relationship that doesn't encourage wanting what is best for the other person.
“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”
- Maria Robinson
And when it comes to our professional lives, the same applies. We could all do with a bit more money, but how can you expect to get more by doing the same thing day after day. And here fear is a huge factor. What happens if I try something new and fail? What will people think?
According to the bible, no human being has the right to judge another, yet we do it all the time. When we gossip about other people, we are actually judging them, and gossip is out of control at the moment, but more will be said about that in a future article.
So, if you are wanting something different in your life, be it emotionally, financially, spiritually or for your health. Start doing something about it. What do you REALLY have to loose?
“Be the change you want to see in the world.”
- Mahatma Gandhi
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
- Reinhold Niebuhr
Monday, September 29, 2008
Monday, September 22, 2008
Lack of focus
“Our thoughts create our reality - where we put our focus is the direction we tend to go.”
- Peter McWilliams
I could write a book on this topic, and maybe one day I will, but for now I will just share a few thoughts with you. Us humans seem to be losing the ability to focus. We have so many distractions in our lives these days, and without offending the fairer sex, the ability to multi-task is not something to be proud of, it creates more stress than you need.
Let me use an example to explain:
A few weeks ago my wife and I went to the gynaecologist for a scan, we went in separate cars and when we got there I asked her if she had noticed how beautiful the coral trees looked, (they are in full bloom now). She hadn't, seems she was too busy thinking about other stuff to notice.
You see, our minds are so full of 'noise' that we can't seem to appreciate life and all it's beauty anymore. We are so busy thinking about the past and what could have been, and worrying about the future and what might be, that we forget about the present moment, the only one that really counts.
So how do we get our focus back? There are many ways, but I can only write about my own experiences. I read 'The Power of Now' - by Eckhart Tolle, and in it he suggests we focus on the mundane tasks that we currently do on auto pilot, like washing your hands. Focus on the smell of the soap, how it feels on your hands, the temperature of the water and the feel of the towel when drying your hands. This will help to bring your focus back to the present moment.
Another way is to meditate. I used to think people who meditate are weird and flaky, until I started doing it myself. These people know something we don't, because it really helps. Now people might think I am weird and flaky, but as Dr. Wayne W. Dyer so accurately put it, "What you think of me is none of my business". Meditation takes huge amounts of discipline, so I decided to get some help, I purchased some brain entrainment CD's to listen to. I am actually listening to one right now. When I use them regularly I notice a huge difference in my ability to focus.
There are so many different products out there, but I can only write about the ones I am using. I found them the least complicated and the most reasonably priced, but have a look for yourself. Click here for more information and to purchase if you are interested.
“The key to success is to focus our conscious mind on things we desire not things we fear.”
- Brian Tracy
Once you have started getting your ability to focus back, you need to focus on the right things. We always tend to focus most of our energy on the negative instead of the positive, and we wonder why things don't seem to be going right. It really is logical, what you put most of your energy into will give you quickest results. So start focusing on the life you want not one you don't. The next step is to take action, but more about that in a future article.
Have a great week, and most of all, enjoy what you do!
“I find hope in the darkest of days, and focus in the brightest. I do not judge the universe.”
- Dalai Lama
- Peter McWilliams
I could write a book on this topic, and maybe one day I will, but for now I will just share a few thoughts with you. Us humans seem to be losing the ability to focus. We have so many distractions in our lives these days, and without offending the fairer sex, the ability to multi-task is not something to be proud of, it creates more stress than you need.
Let me use an example to explain:
A few weeks ago my wife and I went to the gynaecologist for a scan, we went in separate cars and when we got there I asked her if she had noticed how beautiful the coral trees looked, (they are in full bloom now). She hadn't, seems she was too busy thinking about other stuff to notice.
You see, our minds are so full of 'noise' that we can't seem to appreciate life and all it's beauty anymore. We are so busy thinking about the past and what could have been, and worrying about the future and what might be, that we forget about the present moment, the only one that really counts.
So how do we get our focus back? There are many ways, but I can only write about my own experiences. I read 'The Power of Now' - by Eckhart Tolle, and in it he suggests we focus on the mundane tasks that we currently do on auto pilot, like washing your hands. Focus on the smell of the soap, how it feels on your hands, the temperature of the water and the feel of the towel when drying your hands. This will help to bring your focus back to the present moment.
Another way is to meditate. I used to think people who meditate are weird and flaky, until I started doing it myself. These people know something we don't, because it really helps. Now people might think I am weird and flaky, but as Dr. Wayne W. Dyer so accurately put it, "What you think of me is none of my business". Meditation takes huge amounts of discipline, so I decided to get some help, I purchased some brain entrainment CD's to listen to. I am actually listening to one right now. When I use them regularly I notice a huge difference in my ability to focus.
There are so many different products out there, but I can only write about the ones I am using. I found them the least complicated and the most reasonably priced, but have a look for yourself. Click here for more information and to purchase if you are interested.
“The key to success is to focus our conscious mind on things we desire not things we fear.”
- Brian Tracy
Once you have started getting your ability to focus back, you need to focus on the right things. We always tend to focus most of our energy on the negative instead of the positive, and we wonder why things don't seem to be going right. It really is logical, what you put most of your energy into will give you quickest results. So start focusing on the life you want not one you don't. The next step is to take action, but more about that in a future article.
Have a great week, and most of all, enjoy what you do!
“I find hope in the darkest of days, and focus in the brightest. I do not judge the universe.”
- Dalai Lama
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Life
"If we could see the miracle of a single flower clearly, our whole life would change." - Buddha
In today's article I just want to remind people about life and share what I think life should be. Let me use a simple plant as an analogy.
When you look at a seed, what do you see? You should see life, because that's what it is. It's life waiting for the right conditions to express itself. All you need to do is add water and some essential nutrients and the seed begins to grow. Did the seed suddenly find life in the water or nutrients? No, the life was always there. So why do seeds grow? Because it is plant life wanting to express more of itself.
Is it difficult for the seed to grow? That all depends on the conditions in which it is growing, but generally the seed grows with ease. What is the purpose of that plant, that all depends on what type of plant it is. Does the plant question it's existence and purpose? Thankfully, no, it just lives.
Remember this. From one single seed a whole forest can be created.
“The most important things in life aren't things.” - Anthony J. D'Angelo
What does this have to do with humans? Well us humans really do complicate our lives. We question our existence continuously and we are always trying to find our purpose in life. What were we born to do?
Let me ask you this. If we suddenly found out how life began and why, would it really change the way we do things? Would we suddenly all become enlightened beings living enlightened lives? Why do we need the answer in order to change the way we live?
What would happen if we were all suddenly told what our purpose on this planet is? And what if we didn't like this purpose we were given?
Have you noticed in this article how many questions are being asked?
“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” - Howard Thurman
I feel us humans ask far too many questions instead of just living. We are here for the same reason as the simple plant, to express more of life. And the only way to express more of life is live life to the full. So stop questioning why you are here and what you are supposed to be doing, and just enjoy your life. Start doing things that bring out your joy and make you feel good. And my suggestion is to start with the simple things, the small things. I enjoy walking on the beach with my wife, and now we have a dog too, which makes it even more enjoyable.
“Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.” - Ashley Smith
In today's article I just want to remind people about life and share what I think life should be. Let me use a simple plant as an analogy.
When you look at a seed, what do you see? You should see life, because that's what it is. It's life waiting for the right conditions to express itself. All you need to do is add water and some essential nutrients and the seed begins to grow. Did the seed suddenly find life in the water or nutrients? No, the life was always there. So why do seeds grow? Because it is plant life wanting to express more of itself.
Is it difficult for the seed to grow? That all depends on the conditions in which it is growing, but generally the seed grows with ease. What is the purpose of that plant, that all depends on what type of plant it is. Does the plant question it's existence and purpose? Thankfully, no, it just lives.
Remember this. From one single seed a whole forest can be created.
“The most important things in life aren't things.” - Anthony J. D'Angelo
What does this have to do with humans? Well us humans really do complicate our lives. We question our existence continuously and we are always trying to find our purpose in life. What were we born to do?
Let me ask you this. If we suddenly found out how life began and why, would it really change the way we do things? Would we suddenly all become enlightened beings living enlightened lives? Why do we need the answer in order to change the way we live?
What would happen if we were all suddenly told what our purpose on this planet is? And what if we didn't like this purpose we were given?
Have you noticed in this article how many questions are being asked?
“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” - Howard Thurman
I feel us humans ask far too many questions instead of just living. We are here for the same reason as the simple plant, to express more of life. And the only way to express more of life is live life to the full. So stop questioning why you are here and what you are supposed to be doing, and just enjoy your life. Start doing things that bring out your joy and make you feel good. And my suggestion is to start with the simple things, the small things. I enjoy walking on the beach with my wife, and now we have a dog too, which makes it even more enjoyable.
“Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.” - Ashley Smith
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Ego
“It is the nature of the ego to take, and the nature of the spirit to share.” - Proverb
The common misconception is that only men have ego's, but we all have an ego whether we like it or not. What is your ego really? I believe that those of you who read this and are offended by it will only be offended because deep within you, below your layers of ego, you know it is true. (this is an extremely sensitive subject and there have been hundreds of books written about it, I am just scratching the surface here)
Firstly let me tell you what your ego isn't. Your ego isn't you! It's a part of you that tries to prevent the real you from expressing yourself. I recently listened to an audio CD by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, The Power of Intention. Below are what he believes the ego wants us to believe:
1. I am what I have, my possessions define me.
2. I am what I do, my achievements define me.
3. I am what others think of me, my reputation defines me.
4. I am separate from everyone, my body defines me as alone.
5. I am separate from all that is missing in my life, my life space is disconnected from my desires.
6. I am separate from God, my life depends on God's assessment of my worthiness.
Think about it really carefully, when you leave this planet, what do you take with you? What do you leave behind? How will you be remembered? You won't be remembered for all you possessions or achievements, you'll be remembered as a person, your character, your spirit. And to be really blunt, who cares what you are remembered for. You are no longer here.
This is where your ego intervenes, most of us live our lives trying to impress and "keep up with the Jone's" instead of just enjoying our limited time here on earth.
Now don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with wanting the best for yourself and your loved ones. I believe every human being deserves the best of everything. But don't sacrifice your life in pursuit of all these things. Never forget to stay in touch with the real you.
"We are not human beings here for a spiritual experience, but spiritual beings here for a human experience." - Dannion Brinkley
"The most common ego identifications have to do with possessions, the work you do, social status and recognition, knowledge and education, physical appearance, special abilities, relationships, person and family history, belief systems, and often also political, nationalistic, racial, religious, and other collective identifications. None of these is you."
- Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now
So how do we shed these layers of ego? There are 4 stages;
1. Discipline
2. Wisdom
3. Love
4. Surrender (this is where the body and mind no longer run the show)
I have made it as far as stage 3, but frequently slip back into stage 2 and even stage 1. Shedding your ego is quite tricky in this day and age, especially when it has been part of your life for so long. I will continue on my journey and I can't wait to reach the stage of surrender.
I will share more with you about the different stages in future articles.
“Such is the nature of the human ego; it resents its betters and gloats at its lessers.” - Tom Smith
"The people we judge and hate in life are in fact reflections of our disowned selves."
- Dr Hal Stone.
The common misconception is that only men have ego's, but we all have an ego whether we like it or not. What is your ego really? I believe that those of you who read this and are offended by it will only be offended because deep within you, below your layers of ego, you know it is true. (this is an extremely sensitive subject and there have been hundreds of books written about it, I am just scratching the surface here)
Firstly let me tell you what your ego isn't. Your ego isn't you! It's a part of you that tries to prevent the real you from expressing yourself. I recently listened to an audio CD by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, The Power of Intention. Below are what he believes the ego wants us to believe:
1. I am what I have, my possessions define me.
2. I am what I do, my achievements define me.
3. I am what others think of me, my reputation defines me.
4. I am separate from everyone, my body defines me as alone.
5. I am separate from all that is missing in my life, my life space is disconnected from my desires.
6. I am separate from God, my life depends on God's assessment of my worthiness.
Think about it really carefully, when you leave this planet, what do you take with you? What do you leave behind? How will you be remembered? You won't be remembered for all you possessions or achievements, you'll be remembered as a person, your character, your spirit. And to be really blunt, who cares what you are remembered for. You are no longer here.
This is where your ego intervenes, most of us live our lives trying to impress and "keep up with the Jone's" instead of just enjoying our limited time here on earth.
Now don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with wanting the best for yourself and your loved ones. I believe every human being deserves the best of everything. But don't sacrifice your life in pursuit of all these things. Never forget to stay in touch with the real you.
"We are not human beings here for a spiritual experience, but spiritual beings here for a human experience." - Dannion Brinkley
"The most common ego identifications have to do with possessions, the work you do, social status and recognition, knowledge and education, physical appearance, special abilities, relationships, person and family history, belief systems, and often also political, nationalistic, racial, religious, and other collective identifications. None of these is you."
- Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now
So how do we shed these layers of ego? There are 4 stages;
1. Discipline
2. Wisdom
3. Love
4. Surrender (this is where the body and mind no longer run the show)
I have made it as far as stage 3, but frequently slip back into stage 2 and even stage 1. Shedding your ego is quite tricky in this day and age, especially when it has been part of your life for so long. I will continue on my journey and I can't wait to reach the stage of surrender.
I will share more with you about the different stages in future articles.
“Such is the nature of the human ego; it resents its betters and gloats at its lessers.” - Tom Smith
"The people we judge and hate in life are in fact reflections of our disowned selves."
- Dr Hal Stone.
Monday, September 1, 2008
Emotions
“Your intellect may be confused, but your emotions will never lie to you.”
- Roger Ebert
Our emotions are extremely powerful feedback mechanisms, yet most of us choose not to try and understand them and listen to what they are telling us. Believe it or not, our emotions can actually cause us harm and eventually kill us, we will always blame it on some form of disease, (dis-ease), but that's just the easy way out, trying to blame something else, which is far easier than taking responsibility.
What are emotions really? Most people seem to think our emotions have something to do with our heart, mainly because of the feeling a lot of us experience in our chest area during times of intense emotion. But our emotions are actually controlled by 2 glands in our brain, the hypothalamus and the pituitary gland. So, our thoughts controls our emotions and we control our thoughts. Well, most of us do, the rest of us believe we are slaves to our emotions and that life is just mean to us.
So how do we learn to control our emotions? It has taken me years and plenty of reading but I have finally found something that works for me, maybe it will work for you. Below is something called 'The Emotional Guidance Scale' from the book Ask and it is Given by Esther & Jerry Hicks.
1. Joy/Appreciation/Empowered/Freedom/Love
2. Passion
3. Enthusiasm/Eagerness/Happiness
4. Positive Expectation/Belief
5. Optimism
6. Hopefulness
7. Contentment
8. Boredom
9. Pessimism
10. Frustration/Irritation/Impatience
11. Overwhelmed
12. Disappointment
13. Doubt
14. Worry
15. Blame
16. Discouragement
17. Anger
18. Revenge
19. Hatred/Rage
20. Jealousy
21. Insecurity/Guilt/Unworthiness
22. Fear/Grief/Depression/Despair/Powerlessness
The goal is to try and spend as much time as your can in emotion no. 1, but it's not always easy. The biggest mistake people make it to try and go from anger straight to happiness, possible, but not the wisest method. I would recommend going from anger to frustration to hopefulness then to happiness and up to no. 1. Climb the emotional ladder so to speak.
How do you do that? Firstly you need to recognize that you are angry, admit it to yourself, write down why you are angry, it always helps. I can't tell you the number of times I have started writing a letter to my wife and then gone back and read it and realized it'd not such a big deal and the writing helps me get the frustration out of the way. Then just start changing your thoughts, think of your hopes and dreams, think of past memories that have made you laugh, think of the people you love, things you love doing, things you are grateful for. etc.
“The strangest and most fantastic fact about negative emotions is that people actually worship them.”
- P. D. Ouspensky
It really baffles me how many people are unhappy, and how many people talk about negative things most of the time, I suppose it makes them feel better knowing they are not alone in their misery. Anyway, I hope that what I am sharing with you today helps, if it helps just one person I'll be the happiest person on the planet.
“Negative emotion is your indication from your Inner Being that the action you are considering is not in harmony with your greater intentions.”
– Abraham-Hicks
- Roger Ebert
Our emotions are extremely powerful feedback mechanisms, yet most of us choose not to try and understand them and listen to what they are telling us. Believe it or not, our emotions can actually cause us harm and eventually kill us, we will always blame it on some form of disease, (dis-ease), but that's just the easy way out, trying to blame something else, which is far easier than taking responsibility.
What are emotions really? Most people seem to think our emotions have something to do with our heart, mainly because of the feeling a lot of us experience in our chest area during times of intense emotion. But our emotions are actually controlled by 2 glands in our brain, the hypothalamus and the pituitary gland. So, our thoughts controls our emotions and we control our thoughts. Well, most of us do, the rest of us believe we are slaves to our emotions and that life is just mean to us.
So how do we learn to control our emotions? It has taken me years and plenty of reading but I have finally found something that works for me, maybe it will work for you. Below is something called 'The Emotional Guidance Scale' from the book Ask and it is Given by Esther & Jerry Hicks.
1. Joy/Appreciation/Empowered/Freedom/Love
2. Passion
3. Enthusiasm/Eagerness/Happiness
4. Positive Expectation/Belief
5. Optimism
6. Hopefulness
7. Contentment
8. Boredom
9. Pessimism
10. Frustration/Irritation/Impatience
11. Overwhelmed
12. Disappointment
13. Doubt
14. Worry
15. Blame
16. Discouragement
17. Anger
18. Revenge
19. Hatred/Rage
20. Jealousy
21. Insecurity/Guilt/Unworthiness
22. Fear/Grief/Depression/Despair/Powerlessness
The goal is to try and spend as much time as your can in emotion no. 1, but it's not always easy. The biggest mistake people make it to try and go from anger straight to happiness, possible, but not the wisest method. I would recommend going from anger to frustration to hopefulness then to happiness and up to no. 1. Climb the emotional ladder so to speak.
How do you do that? Firstly you need to recognize that you are angry, admit it to yourself, write down why you are angry, it always helps. I can't tell you the number of times I have started writing a letter to my wife and then gone back and read it and realized it'd not such a big deal and the writing helps me get the frustration out of the way. Then just start changing your thoughts, think of your hopes and dreams, think of past memories that have made you laugh, think of the people you love, things you love doing, things you are grateful for. etc.
“The strangest and most fantastic fact about negative emotions is that people actually worship them.”
- P. D. Ouspensky
It really baffles me how many people are unhappy, and how many people talk about negative things most of the time, I suppose it makes them feel better knowing they are not alone in their misery. Anyway, I hope that what I am sharing with you today helps, if it helps just one person I'll be the happiest person on the planet.
“Negative emotion is your indication from your Inner Being that the action you are considering is not in harmony with your greater intentions.”
– Abraham-Hicks
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